5.6.14

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 5.8.14

Greetings, earthlings. I hope things is okay for youse, but I doubts it.

It has been a bad week for multiple people. Why? What’s going on? Is Mercury in retrograde? I thought everything was supposed to get better for everyone as I aged. Someone told me I was promised that by Dan Savage.

Here’s some silver lining, though: I am going to see Ursula K. Le Guin tonight. Some kind of hootenanny, if I’m not mistaken.

Why can’t adults ever just get along without alcohol/substances? Agreeing to disagree is not the end of the problem, it’s the cessation of communication. I’m not saying there’s only one right way, I’m just saying why are you having an argument in the first place?

Arguments should lead to makeouts. BOOM. World peace.

With tongue: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Disagreein’ With a Gopher

5.8.14

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 5.8.14

Greetings, earthlings. I hope things is okay for youse, but I doubts it.

It has been a bad week for multiple people. Why? What’s going on? Is Mercury in retrograde? I thought everything was supposed to get better for everyone as I aged. Someone told me I was promised that by Dan Savage.

Here’s some silver lining, though: I am going to see Ursula K. Le Guin tonight. Some kind of hootenanny, if I’m not mistaken.

Why can’t adults ever just get along without alcohol/substances? Agreeing to disagree is not the end of the problem, it’s the cessation of communication. I’m not saying there’s only one right way, I’m just saying why are you having an argument in the first place?

Arguments should lead to makeouts. BOOM. World peace.

With tongue: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Disagreein’ With a Gopher

5.13.14

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 5.13.14

Aloha, beautiful creatures. I hope you had a nice weekend. I did, for the most part.

I bought a really awesome new coat at Grey Bears. It’s ankle-length, camel color, and fully wool. I want unseasonably cold weather. I also got a tremendously ugly sweater which will be worn as a non-hipstery ironic dress.

Even better (I know, it’s hard to imagine anything better than cold weather clothes), my darling Sophie came over and we spent ages worrying about an iguana. We went for a walk and Sophie found a lizard. I have a -5 to my spot because I always look down when I walk so I don’t trip, so I didn’t see the damn thing.

We determined that it was enjoying the sweet warmth of freedom and suggested it try sitting in a nice tree. Or Sophie threw her sweater at it in an attempt to capture/rescue it and it teleported.

Leapin’ lizards!: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Iguana Liberation ‘Lliance

10.1.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 10.1.13

Hello, and welcome to our new schedule. It will be better for you and better for Punch-a-Bear. So, now, rather than new drawings on Monday and Wednesday, we will be doing this thing Tuesdays and Thursdays.

This is all because I now have weekends off (to go sailing!). I also have an hour lunch at work, which is time that would otherwise be squandered. Additionally, I recently found out the password for the wifi at my place of employment. These are all good things.

For my birthday, I went to Berkeley. I managed to end up on the only street that doesn’t have an open-on-Sundays Ethiopian restaurant. Consequently, I had Nepali food. Which is steak sauce. I also went to a very nice bookstore. I got two Virginia Woolf books. Fin.

What’s got other drawings?: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Rapidly Losing Power!

9.25.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.25.13

Hey there, little fella. I hope you’re having a good birthday week. I’m kinda just relaxing.

You know something is wrong when you think “it’s my morning to do nothing before work; I should’ve gotten up earlier.”

I should’ve, though. I am pretty much just going to spend my whole morning doing PAB (instead of taking a luxurious bath or washing dishes).

PAB is the only commitment I’ve done a pretty decent job with keeping.

I think “cheap” as far as dating goes is not just about money. Are you also wasting your valuable time by not being at home enjoying Star Trek?

As if it were a thing:Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Enjoying Spock

9.23.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.23.13

Good day, fellow humans. I hope everything is okay for you, it being a day and all.

My birthday is Sunday. Holy carp.

It’s hard to believe. I keep getting older, even though I have not been prepared to be an adult for, honestly, my whole life. I’m not becoming more prepared as I age, I’m just losing time to figure out what’s going on.

I still drink water out of a bottle instead of putting it in a glass like a civilized adult.

1/3-life crisis.

I just remembered my password: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
I Saw Flight of the Conchords Live
(Nothing Else Matters)

9.18.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.18.13

“SHOW HER THE LARGE MEAT. NEW SUMMER OFFERS.”

I was unaware that this sort of spam still existed and does, in fact, get directed to me. This is some high quality bad spam and I deleted it with very little contemplation.

As a vegetarian, I do want to show an unspecified person who uses feminine pronouns THE meat. The largest meat in Texas. The Holy Meat.

The Holy Meat is steak covered in bacon-wrapped shrimp. Con queso!

I think that thoroughly fucks with all of the major religious taboos about meat. If I didn’t think of something, just add that in.

I will be serving this entrée at my new restaurant. Cafe Plattertudes.

 

In case of a squirrel invasion: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Restaurateur

9.16.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.16.13

It’s 1:44 in the morning. Do you know what  my neighbors are doing?

This is a question I have, but it is based on a public service announcement from A Long Time Ago. But, really, is Monday morning the time to be making these noises?

Anyway, there is a fly in my house. This is because I have a great propensity for leaving the door(s) open. It is absolutely astonishing how annoying a fly can be. There are so many things to land on in this house, and yet my tangled hair is the most tempting.

I’m guessing because it’s made out of sugar.

In case of a squirrel invasion: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Anthropomortal

9.11.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.11.13

Hi. Hope you’re all doing splendidly well. Everything is coming up over this a way. Very excited for birthday happenings.

Today’s drawing is brought to you by the letter “F.” That stands for “fucked up and thought maybe things would work out okay.” Clearly they worked out. Just not well.

And again we get to see my love of women in jumpsuits. I’m eating quinoa and carrots even though there are chocolate bars directly behind me. They cost money, and it’s highly doubtful I have any cash. So that explains that.

Jeez, Joe. I will send you your prize next week at the latest. Now that it’s publicly declared, I won’t forget. That’s the theory, anyway.

Secrets for your eyes only: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
Had a Dollar, Got Chocolate

9.9.13

Punch-a-Bear Archives      Drawing for 9.9.13

Yo, yo, yo. I hope you are having a magnificent Monday.

As it happens, I have a magnificent sunburn. It makes my neck hurt when things touch it. The more you know. I am going to have an enviable partial tan later, though. Reap them rewards.

Etching things is always mysterious. You never know exactly what is going to happen. At least not if you’ve only done it twice in your life. The way to keep activities mysterious is to do them infrequently.

Indeedily doodily.

Futurely: Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter.

Love,
Tabia B.
MC Etcher